This simple word conjures such a splendid cornucopia of images within one's mind. Depending on your own personal life diary, you may think of flowers, candies, perfume, and silk sheets. You may recall an opera, a movie, or a particular piece of literature. Some immediately think of a language - French, Portuguese, or Italian... Perhaps you recall a past or present love affair.

   It was in the solitary period of my life, following a very devastating divorce ten years ago, that I began to build a world of romance based solely on a love affair with myself through my love of art, music, poetry, history and prose. For the first time in my adult life I felt in control of my environment.

   Ponder for a moment about a particular person you know or have encountered in life. A person who has "that" glow. A person who radiates a quiet , captivating peace. If you could look into the private aspects of their lives, you would more than likely find a human whose environment is strategically controlled. It provides them with the grounding they need to exist within this violent, ambivalent world. They take great pains to ensure that they have the components necessary to feed their souls. The nurturing of our bodies, our souls and our hearts must begin and end with us. We must take responsibility for our own happiness. We must take pride in who we are and the journeys we embark upon.  

   To provide further understanding, I offer you a glimpse into my world...ways in which I incorporate the five components of romance into my everyday life:

    I have spread throughout my home, into every room (yes, even the privy), reminders of love. This can be as large as the print of a Rembrant, "Dance in the City" which hangs in my dining room; or as small as the tiny book of poems by Percy Bysshe Shelley which sits upon my coffee table. It is the knickknack or two someone gave as a gift from his or her heart. It is the lace upon my windows or the canopy of roses and white tulle, which hang above my bed.

    I surround myself as well with ideas, concepts and people who fascinate and intrigue me. Fascination is inspiring to me as a writer and it is the adrenaline for my thought process. The songbirds that wake me each morning at 4:00 am fascinate me. The man and his dog that live down the road intrigue me. I am fascinated by the tiny white flowers I pass each day on my way to work...they seem to open and close at will, with no particular reasoning attached. I am extremely intrigued by the behavior of men when it comes to relationships (laughing) - I best move on though - I could spend the rest of my days writing on this particular mystery of life!

    This is one of the greatest components for the cultivation of romance. I find adventure each time I step through the doors of my favorite antique store, bookstore or art gallery. I find adventure in walks on the beach or down my road or in an exotic new restaurant. I bring the adventures home by carefully selecting items that will always brings forth emotional recall from that experience. For example, upon my coffee table is a small crystal plate filled with exquisite seashells. The shells were acquired during a walk on the beach with my two young daughters. I cannot look upon that dish without being immediately transported to that late winter's afternoon. I hear their laughter, smell the sweet sea spray upon my skin and feel the damp sand beneath my feet.

   As a lover I pride myself on keeping the mystery alive in a relationship. As a woman, I find it comes pretty naturally to me. I love to surprise people, leaving them wanting more. I work very hard at this aspect of my life. I do this by keeping certain things private. For instance, I will never let allow my lover to witness my moments of personal care. Nothing could be less romantic than watching someone brush their teeth, or apply cosmetics or shave their underarms. I know this sounds a bit weird, but I just believe in keeping the foundations of my physical beauty behind closed doors. If you doubt this, think back to your dating days as a youth. Would you ever have allowed that young beau to see you getting ready?  See what I mean

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   When we cultivate love, fascination, adventure and mystery into our daily lives, we become extraordinarily passionate people and we experience extraordinary events. We see things as we have never seen them before. We appreciate ourselves, our special and individual gifts and talents - as well as those of others. Our world slows and the beauty of it all is allowed to caress us with its wonder.

   The cultivation of romance into daily life is never contingent on whether or not you have a lover. The cultivation of romance is about self-discovery, self-preservation.... Ensuring that no matter what happens in our journey through life, we have a foundation that nurtures inspires and encourages our success. A foundation that WE ourselves build, and that relies on no one else for its strengths and endurance. 

   The very next time you pass by a magnificent bouquet of fragrant blooms, or find yourself paused in front of a gallery gazing upon a breathtaking piece of art, or at the moment you feel the sensuous, fluid folds of a silk gown slide over your skin...freeze frame the emotion you experience at that very moment. Your heart is speaking to you. Your soul revealing itself.  Listen and you will hear it!

   Love - Fascination - Adventure - Mystery and Extraordinary Events. Romance is indeed, a brilliant kaleidoscope of all of the above. It is often the simplest of pleasures we select to bring into our lives that have the greatest impact on our journey.

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